Note: No time to edit this down to a shorter episode. For those of you not amused or offended by
our extended familY, I apologize. The memories kept coming as I wrote and may be enjoyed by
those who were there that winter celebration. The farm is now gone. Cousin Roy Skeoch’s daughter,
Roberta, born and living in New Zealand will enjoy Roy’s horse radish devilry delivered personally by our grand
daughter Molly who is now touring New Zealand and will no doubt find Roy’s grave. Tourists must
think that Skeoch is a Maouri word when they see that grave.
EPISODE 739 CAR STORY #1: SNOWBOUND AT SKEOCH HOME FARM CIRCA DECEMBER1960
alan skeoch
Feb. 13, 2023
Skeoch Home Farmhouse, circa 1960…Imagine two feet of snow
and a raging snowstorm on a winter night. That is the back house on
far left.
SKEOCH HOME FARM BARN…”Red, park the car on the south side, away from the wind and snow”
“I was raised here and will park the car wherever I want.”
“Oh Red, you fathead”
1) One bitter winter night we drove from Toronto to the Fergus home farm of
the Skeochs. Temperature was at the brass monkey stage. Dad was driving
which we tried to avoid but failed. We made it to the farm with ease.
“Red, park the car out of the wind on the east side of the barn.”
“No. Parking it here, close to the drivewau.”
“Snowstorm coming…wind….drifting snow on North side of the barn.
“What do you know about this farm? I was born here.”
“Oh Red, you fathead.”
So we left the car and made our through the wind driven snow
to the farmhouse where dad’s brothers were arguing as usual and his sisters
were rolling their eyes as usual. After gorging on heaps of food a poker game
was started.
“Red, we should get home. The storm is bad.”
“Not until I get a few dollars back.”
Beer was present but in limited quantity thanks to aunt Greta and ‘Lid’ who were not present
but still had influence. Eric and I had no
idea why aunt Elizabeth was cailed ‘Lid’. perhaps because of her hat or more likely from
the expression “put a LID on it! She had strong opinions on life and tried to keep
her brothers in line. Failed.
Lots of yelling…laughing, arguing…kidding around. Eric, my brother, was a rather picky
eater and Mom said “Now Eric, you eat up your dinner tonight. It’s Christmas, ant Mabel has
been cooking and baking all week.” Which was true.
Eric and I were rather shy. City kids. Not used to the hustle and bustle of farm life in
big families Cousin Roy saw this as an opportunity for some devilry when it came
time for the apple sauce. Eric took one bite and made a face. Mom saw that and
said, “Now Eric, eat up you dessert.”
Cousin Roy hung around. Watching Eric like an eagle watching a trout. Straight face with
a slight upward curl to his lips. Eric took a couple bites…and stopped dead.
Roy let out a hoop of laughter. Eric’s desert was raw horse radish not apple sauce.
Laughter exploded . Seemed out knew the horse radish joke…even Eric now.
(Note: Non Skeoch readers might find these names a burden so just skip along)
WHO WAS PRESENT THAT NIGHT? SOME OF THE EXTENDED FAMILY BELOW
Norman, Arche, Elsie, Arthur, Arnold (Red) Skeoch
There were 10 children born on he Skeoch home farm (James Skeoch family) most of
whom filled the local schoolhouse when they were smaller . In Dec. 1960 they were grown
up and most were present the day we got snowbound
When Red’s sisters were present the family was less explosive. Aunts Greta, Lena
and Elizabeth in from row, John, Norman and Red (Arnold) in back row.
A WHOPPING BIG FAMILY…AND UNPREDICTSBLE AT TIMES
Aunts Greta, Lena, Elizabeth, Mabel…Cousins Margie, Sandy, Patti and
the twins Joan and Jeannette. Uncles Norman and Archie and I think Uncle Ernest and his
wife Ayleen were there. Along with the Toronto delegations …Uncle Art nd aunt Mary and
their kids Kenny, Jean and Big John…mom, dad, Eric and me. Lid and her
brood were not present (Uncle Frank and Lid with kids Eleanor, mary, Jim and Owen). Nor were
the Metcalfes, (aunt Greta and Uncle Irvine with Harvey and Gordon).. nor Jim and Ruth Skeoch
with Lloyd and Vernon and his brother Bruce and Jean and their kids. some of the Tosh family Lena and Wellington Tosh
with Helen, Lorne. Donald. Audrey. Ernest was always present.
Figure there were between 17 and 20 people present…and about another 20 or 30 who
were absent but talked about.
“What’s all the yelling about?”
“Skeoch men having a conversation.”
The family was bewildering in numbers….aggressive to passive in behaviour…shy and bold… mostly
bold…. although Eric and I would be called shy. Most were Loud…very loud. The house smelled of ensilage
and manure in the mud room… then roasted turkey and chocolate cake in the kitchen …then the smell
of beer, cigars and cigarettes where the men played poker and occasionally threw a punch. Catch as catch can seating
with the unlucky braced against the stone walls of the fieldstone house. Out door toilet (back house)
was a long run from the house,,,very social two seater
The beer was under loose hay in the barn…a safe place that was unlikely to be found by
the side of the family that considered empty beer bottles marked the trail to damnation.
Horse radish. All hooting snd yelling at Eric’s expense. Mom had been suckered into playing a role.
Dad, too. Not sure dad thought it was funny. Dad was always ready to fight if he felt we needed help.
Eric was more than a little non plussed
but did not cry. I was lucky. Forgotten snd ignored which was fine by me.
The worst wasywt to come. Norman went out to check the cattle in the barn and reported that
the snow storm was still severe at which point mom suggested it was time to leave and head
forToronto. We wrapped ourselves and stepped into the storm. The barn was just a dark shadow
as the wind drove the show at almost right angles.
Dad was cold sober. He never drank much. Perhaps a bottle of beer now and then. His addiction was
horses not alcohol.
“Oh Red, what will we do now?”
“pull the snow away from the doors and get in…start the bastard and head home”
“There, you can squeeze in now Methuselum.”
(Methusela was the oldest person in the Bible. Mom was a year older than dad so
he called her Methuselum as a pet name. He tacked on the ‘um’ because it sounded
better…shortened to ‘Method’ sometimes. Mystified many people.)
Mom Squeezed in as did Eric and I. Dad took the wheel. Mom did not offer criticism
but we all knew she was right about parking debate long hours earlier.
“Goddamn thing won’t turn over. Dead as a skunk on the highway.”
“Lift the hood.”
We managed to lift the hood with wind blasting us with snow.
“Where is he motor?”
“Packed with snow….invisible”
the wind had driven the snow up under the hood then packed it tight
like a snowball.
“Get Norman, Red”
Norman argued clad in buffalo cot and at with ear protecters….grinning.
“What can we do, Norman, snow has made car into a goddamn snowman.”
“Have to haul you to Fergus with the tractor.”
“What good will that do…it’s near midnight.
“I’ll get Drew Elgie to open his service garage and we
can set the car in there until the snow melts…then jump
the battery.”
“Will that work?”
“How he hell would I know…Drew Elgie will figure something out”’
“What about Methooz and the kids?”
“Enough talk. I’ll get a chain and the tractor. You can all sit in
the car was I tow it to Fergus. “
“Bloody cold job for you Norman.”
“Bitch of a job…so let’s get at it.”
And so we were hauled to Fergus. Storm still raging. Four of us in the car, freezing cold
as Uncle Norman drove the tractor with a long chain attached under our bumper. Slowly
moving down the lane and along the sideroad to Fergus where Drew Elgie had opened
up one of the service bays where Uncle Norman wedged our car.
And we sat there. The snow melted. The battery was boosted and miracle of miracles the car started.
No money changed hands. This was a rescue not a profit making enterprise.
As a matter of fact this was not even the 53 Meteor. It was our next used car, a Dodge I think. A used
car though and therefore not always dependable.
Back in the Skeoch home farm the poker game continued and a few beers were slipped into the
farm house from the manger in the barn. Cigarettes and cigars were lit. Laughter and arguments
…a remarkable extended Skeoch family at ease.
I wonder if all this could happen today? Our extended family has drifted apart and many have died.
Perhaps only this memory remains now that the big barn has been taken apart by Mennonites and the stone
farm house has been remodelled by people we no longer know.
Methuselum (Elsie) Skeoch and her husband Red (Arnold) Skeoch will never be
forgotten as long as memory serves.
alaln
Eric and I Have always fowler lucky ro have been fragment of the Skeoch family. I do not know if Eric
ever adopted a taste for horse radish. I know we miss Roy.
