EPISODE 657 “I WILL NEVER USE A LEAF BLOWER. RAKING LEAVES IS BETTER” (FAMOUS LAST WORDS FROM MARJORIE)
( and the night A 12 year old boy set a street of dry leaves on fire with a clothes peg zip gun)
alan skeoch
oct. 11,2022
THE NEW LEAF BLOWER
“Alan, this leaf blower that Andrew gave me is wonderful.”
“I thought you liked raking leaves?”
“I do…and would like it better if you would help.”
“”i bought you the rake.”
“You could help.”
“But we only had one rake…and now you have Andrew’s leaf blower
you neither need a rake nor do you need help.”
“Oh, yes, Marjorie those mounds of dry leave remind me on s evening back in 1950 when I made
a clothes peg zip gun. It was an evening of which I am not proud.”
ALL the leaves in these pictures will eventual reach the ground where most will just lie
there and return to earth from whence they came.
Suppose Marjorie is not available to rake or blow your leaves away from your lawn. Well get
ready for a big crop of voles and mice this winter….little creatures that make leafy homes in
fallen leaves.
HAVE YOU EVER MADE A ZIP GUN FROM A CLOTHES PEG?
About the year 1950 homeowners raked their leaves into huge piles in the gutters
in front oft their houses. I remember one street in particular. It stretched from Runnymede public
School in West Toronto down to Bloor Street. A very leafy street. A perfect street for me. I did not
consider myself a vandal although others may differ on that score. I was a test mechanic,
The October air on that street had the smell of burning leaves. Some residents carefully burned their
leaves but most people piled them in the gutter. Which seemed like a god given opportunity to test my
zip gun made from clothes pegs with wire snaps. Those clothes pegs could easily be remanufactured
into weapons that could snap fire wooden matches…shoot the flaming slivers five or six feet as I
remember. I had a whole box wooden matches. Ammunition.
Now on that October evening in 1950 I had never heard of the burning of Moscow. And grandma never
said much about the burning of Englehart, Ontario in 1906 except to say mom and the Freemans were
burned out of their home. Perhaps if the danger of fire had been drummed into me, I would not
have set the WEst Toronto street on fire.
SET THE STREET ON FIRE
My 12 year old brain was not sophisticated. I was just doing a simple experiment. If Idrove down
the street firing lit matches from my clothes peg weapon,, would the street catch fire with flames
racing towards me as I peddled and fired. I did not expect success.
When I looked back up the street I could see
some fire and people out beating burning leaves to death.
Were they pointing at me? I did not return to the crime
scene and took a different route back to our house at 455 Annette Street.
I kept this little secret until today…72 years later.
Today our piles of leaves are collected by the City of Mississauga. Millions of leaves
are composted into food for gardens.
How did this sensible use of leaves as garden manure originate. Was the idea hatched
by some brilliant environmentalists? Or was leaf collectomg started due too the fire I triggered on that street in
West Toronto? Maybe I am vain. Maybe I should not take credit for the City
of Mississauga leaf collecting.
One thing is true. Marjorie and her leaf blower ensure that no pile of dry leaves are anywhere
near my zip gun. Truth be told, I do not even remember how to make the gun.
And who uses clothes pins today anyhow?
If you are planning to send my name to the Leaf Police, I will deny the conflagration
ever happened on an October night in 1950. There is no one to remember. Hearsay evidence
has little weight in a court of law (I think!)
alan skeoch
Oc.t 11, 2022
Exaggeraton? Of course. But with a kernel of truth
SETTIN’ THE WOODS ON FIRE
by Hak Williams
Lyrics
Comb your hair and paint and powderYou act proud and I’ll act prouderYou sing loud and I’ll sing louderTonight we’re settin’ the woods on fire
You’re my gal and I’m your fellerDress up in my frock and yellerI’ll look swell but you’ll look swellerSettin’ the woods on fire
We’ll take in all the honky tonksTonight we’re having funWe’ll show the folks a brand new danceThat never has been done
I don’t care who thinks we’re sillyYou’ll be daffy and I’ll be dillyWe’ll order up two bowls of chiliSettin’ the woods on fire
I’ll gas up my hot rod stokerWe’ll get hotter than a pokerYou’ll be broke but I’ll be brokerTonight we’re settin’ the woods on fire
We’ll sit close to one anotherUp one street and down the otherWe’ll have a time oh brotherSettin’ the woods on fire
We’ll put aside a little timeTo fix a flat or twoMy tyres and tubes are doin’ fineBut the air is showin’ through
You clap hands and I’ll start bowin’We’ll do all the law’s allowin’Tomorrow I’ll be right back plowin’Settin’ the woods on fire
Source: Musixmatch
Songwriters: Fred Rose / Ed Nelson Sr.
Settin’ The Woods On Fire lyrics © Sony/atv Milene Music
