{"id":21954,"date":"2022-08-18T09:06:50","date_gmt":"2022-08-18T13:06:50","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/alanskeoch.ca\/?p=21954"},"modified":"2022-08-30T18:51:13","modified_gmt":"2022-08-30T22:51:13","slug":"episode-627-please-get-out-of-my-way-alan-im-busy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/alanskeoch.ca\/?p=21954","title":{"rendered":"EPISODE 627 “PLEASE GET OUT OF MY WAY, ALAN….I’M BUSY”"},"content":{"rendered":"
EPISODE 627   \u201cALAN, PLEASE GET OUT OF MY WAY, ALAN, I\u2019M VERY BUSY\u201d<\/p>\n

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alan skeoch<\/div>\n
August 17, 2022<\/div>\n

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\u201cPlease Get out of my way , Alan, I am busy.\u201d<\/div>\n
\u201cNow is that any way to talk to your husband?\u201d<\/div>\n
\u201cOnly way \u2026 if the husband is you, Alan.\u201d<\/div>\n

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Naturally I was deeply hurt by this order.  Marjorie\u2019s \u201cOrder Number One\u201d<\/div>\n
But I will follow instructions.<\/div>\n

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Marjorie seems overworked\u2026do not see why.<\/div>\n

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Alan, put out the garbage\u2026.I  do not do garbage<\/div>\n
Alan, cut the grass\u2026three lawns\u2026.I do not do grass, bought you a new mower<\/div>\n
Alan, could you load and empty the dishwasher at least once in your life\u2026.I do not do dishes<\/div>\n
Alan, could you at least put  your clothes in the laundry basket\u2026.I do not do laundry<\/div>\n
Alan, could you at least make rice pudding\u2026I do not cook even though I love rice pudding.<\/div>\n
Alan, could you help make the bed\u2026.I do not make beds<\/div>\n
Alan, could you wash the truck\u2026.I do not wash trucks<\/div>\n
Alan, could you clean out the truck at least\u2026.I bought you a leaf blower for that purpose.<\/div>\n
Alan, you did not buy the leaf blower, it was a gift from Andrew\u2026..I do not do gifts<\/div>\n
Alan, could you clean the toilet\u2026.are you kidding, I do not do toilets.<\/div>\n
Alan, could you cut those broken tree branches\u2026.I do not butcher trees.<\/div>\n
Alan, could you dust and air the dog bed\u2026I do not do dog beds<\/div>\n
Alan, could you pull weeds from zinnia bed\u2026.I do not pulll weeds, I think the zinnias like company anyway<\/div>\n
Alan, could you get rid to the squirrels in our roof\u2026I do not do squirrels<\/div>\n
Alan, could you go to the store for bread\u2026..i do not shop, why do you think I bought you a bicycle?<\/div>\n
Alan, could you feed the birds, seed is all ready for you\u2026.I do not feed birds<\/div>\n
Alan, could you take Woody for a walk\u2026.I do not walk dogs.<\/div>\n
Alan, could you get gas for y car\u2026.I do not get gas, too expensive<\/div>\n
Alan, could you clean up your desk\u2026.I keep important stuff on top, like my camera. I do not do desks.<\/div>\n
Alan, could you be a spare with my bridge club\u2026I do not do bridge unless flattered as a helping husband<\/div>\n
Alan, could you clean the windows, the grandkids are coming\u2026.I don\u2019t do windows.<\/div>\n
Alan, could you at least hold the ladder?  \u2026.suppose I could<\/div>\n

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Alan,  I am very busy\u2026 Doing What Marjorie?<\/div>\n

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Now readers should not get too alarmed.  These are overstatements<\/div>\n
meant to be self-decrecating.  Granted, however, they are close to the truth.<\/div>\n
And I must make some changes.  I\u2019m a man.  I can change. I think. Maybe.h Right now I do not know how to use the stove,<\/div>\n
the washer or the drier  Nor do I know how used clothes get from our bedroom to<\/div>\n
the laundry basket.   But I can change.<\/div>\n

<\/div>\n
My indolence is not all my fault.  When we got married Marjorie politely asked<\/div>\n
me to \u2019stay out of the kitchen\u2019\u2026a strategic error on her part.  And on my part as<\/div>\n
well because I can no longer look after myself.  Marjorie was a professional\u2026a <\/div>\n
U of T  Home Ec grad.<\/div>\n

<\/div>\n
 Before marriage I was a prospector and had a crew to look<\/div>\n
after.  We rotated the cooking.  Ate a lot of porridge and French toast.  Self-reliant.<\/div>\n
Was even skilled at cutting the first slice from our sides of sowbelly (bacon) because that\u2019s<\/div>\n
where the blow flies laid their larva every day.  Gross, I know that.  Marriage<\/div>\n
ended that bit of self-reliance.  Marjorie even joined our bush crew one summer\u2026cook,<\/div>\n
seamstress, entertainer.  Entertainer?  Yes, she had to make a bathing suit<\/div>\n
for Serge Lavoie\u2026.bathing suits were not needed until she arrived with her sewing machine which<\/div>\n
was just a boat anchor at Mile 79 on the ACR because we had no electricity.<\/div>\n
She had scissors, needles and thread however.  <\/div>\n

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Why does Marjorie do so much work?  Simple and admiring answer is that women are<\/div>\n
natural  multi-taskers.  They can have three pots on the burners and a couple<\/div>\n
of pies in the oven all at once while emptying the dishwasher and getting the daily<\/div>\n
paper.  <\/div>\n

<\/div>\n
I TRIED TO CHANGE LAST WEEK\u2026FAILED<\/div>\n

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\u201cMarjorie, today I am going to make rice pudding,\u201d I announced last week.<\/div>\n
\u201cWonders never cease.\u201d<\/div>\n
\u201cWhere is the rice\u2026and brown sugar, cinnamon, raisons?  I have the milk\u201d<\/div>\n
\u201cJust let me get the rice ready,\u201d she interrupted and got The rice boiling.<\/div>\n
\u201cRice is the essence of rice pudding, how do you expect me to be self-reliant?\u201d<\/div>\n
\u201cPay attention to the stove top. You could burn yourself or set the house on fire\u201d<\/div>\n

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Bottom line, I really did not make the rice pudding.<\/div>\n

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Marjorie is a multi multi multi multi tasker.    Lucky man, Alan.<\/div>\n

<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

EPISODE 627   \u201cALAN, PLEASE GET OUT OF MY WAY, ALAN, I\u2019M VERY BUSY\u201d alan skeoch August 17, 2022 \u201cPlease Get out of my way , Alan, I am busy.\u201d \u201cNow is that any way to talk to your husband?\u201d \u201cOnly way \u2026 if the husband is you, Alan.\u201d Naturally I was deeply hurt by […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-21954","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/alanskeoch.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21954","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/alanskeoch.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/alanskeoch.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alanskeoch.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alanskeoch.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=21954"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/alanskeoch.ca\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21954\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/alanskeoch.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=21954"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alanskeoch.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=21954"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/alanskeoch.ca\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=21954"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}